Silent Cry

My morning begins
Thinking of my life
A sigh reaches out
One more day of strife

I put on my mask
Do I appear bold
No one around knows
I am scared and cold

Things seem so different
when in retrospective
I simply smile to myself
On others perspective

Time is fading away
So I cling to my memory
Motivating myself
With every possible story

I struggle to see the sunshine
When all I see is so blue
Everyone says life will get better
I hope what they say is true

Life doesn’t wish me in its life
Nor am wanted in its heart
Some pain troubled me today
Is that my heart which hurts

I call you right away
Is that you who speak
or some strangers voice
You sternly remind me
That now I am just a noise

I lose once again
My soul cries with pain
I've got nothing to lose
I've got nothing to gain

What is life we ask

Life may be harsh & cold
Or a beautiful dream to behold
While we plan of life ahead
Death may be lurking behind

None knows what’s there in life’s cup
As it has its own downs & ups
This moment it may lift us to the top
And then very next drop us down

We don’t know from life what to hope
Just that it has its own treasure trove
Sometimes to treat us with respect
Or just shower us with contempt

First life gets us all confused
And then smiles seeing us bemused
We keep looking for answers
Shuffling between our joy and fears

This is the answer I found for me
Is it yours you may test and see
Life is an uncompleted task
One we must complete
Before our end we meet

Fear & the extra mile

I almost had a brush with death (quoting the Doc's words) & must say that it was a real scary experience......one which makes me love life more. Through this poem I share my fears ....the helplessness......my thoughts ...then & now ..... :-)

With each passing cloud
I feel my life flow out
Is it reality or just me
Trapped in some shroud

I feel nothing
A trance all pervading
Darkness all around
Lurking thirsty hounds

Alone I fight the mist
Struggling to cross the ocean
Determined-I clench my fist
My life won’t go in vein

Then the sound of the closing doors
Or maybe my life swish pass by
Willing to shut the fear out
The tears well out of my empty eyes

I feel myself a shadow
A faintness of what I used to be
I shrink away from the shroud
Or from the darkness all around

I wonder if I was gone that day
Would I linger in your memory
Someone you might miss forever
or a feeling that would flow away

I sit and think of that moment
when I saw death smile
One that will always force me
to walk that extra mile.

Bleeding Tears

I know the pain of stifled cries
The heart gets broken
while the eyes cry
Do they reflect hidden fears
Or is it the hurt
...which flow as tears
Am I capable of the same
Do I suffocate - is that my terrain
Now I feel suffocated - say that again !

Family

It's been years for me of solitude.
Years of being alone- yet not so alone
Just the way they have embraced me
Every time they found me forlorn.
Their whiteness smilingly telling me
Of the hope that had not yet gone.
If only these walls could speak their heart -
Perhaps they would call me their own !

My son - my father

Son - a magical word

that always brings a smile

as it opens vaults of fond moments

which linger in my mind

Memories- only the happy kind

Keeps me warm through the winters

And makes the summers divine

Thoughts of you bring back the years

When you held my fingers

And we learnt to walk together

Of the dreams we shared on the terrace

with our secret talks

One moment you were my son

Next my bosom friend

Before I could bat an eyelid

Found you as my teacher

Guiding me through the paths of life

Help me cope with anger & strife

A son you remained for just a while

Then turned into a father

Charming with that naughty smile

May you remain so forever

I fly again

What junction of life this is
frozen like a window sill
not able to do anything but watch
As everything goes downhill

one moment I was on cloud nine
everything felt oh just so very fine
What I saw was a new beginning
My lonely life taking a new meaning

I tried to find new wings
Looked around to find some twigs
To build a nest- my very own
Where my heart once again could sing

Lurking in the shadows was a storm
To wipe away my dreams before
they took life's form
I wandered looking for the broken pieces

But no, I will not give up
I am not willing for more pain
I will not lead a life mundane
I look at the sky & smile
He responds with this rain

Once again I take control
And start the climb uphill
My life I am going to lead
My dreams I will not let anyone kill :-)